"Love yourself first, and everything else will fall into place." -Lucille Ball
What is self-care? In the health industry, self-care includes any function which is deliberately initiated and controlled by the individual. The term is typically used when discussing preventative techniques, such as proper diet, exercise, hygiene, or rest. While these types of self-care promote good health, they tend to address the physical being more than the emotional or energetic self.
In order to truly feel better and adopt a more positive outlook, you need self-care that nurtures the spirit. The most essential self-care is as simple as identifying your own needs and treating yourself with respect.
Too often we find ourselves devoting so much time toward nurturing family members and friends that we forget to save some of that positive energy for ourselves. This leads to stress, imbalance, and lack of peace. To restore and safeguard our wellbeing, in terms of both body and mind, it is vital to follow twelve rules. You’ll find them italicized throughout the rest of this article.
Have you ever found yourself going along with the crowd, despite that little voice in the back of your mind whispering some level of discomfort or apprehension? Peer pressure is difficult to overcome, even for adults. The secret is to give yourself permission to take a step back. If it feels wrong, don’t do it.
Don’t agree to something just because you’re afraid to go against the flow. In short, don’t be a people pleaser. Disappointing a friend or loved one is difficult, but so is disappointing yourself. This is why it is so important to stick up for yourself and say what you mean. Your friends and family want you to be happy, but they cannot read your mind to learn what you’re comfortable with or what you really want to do. You have to tell them.
While working on clear communications with others, you may also need to practice listening to yourself. When you have a gut instinct about a person, place, or decision, don’t ignore it. Always trust your instincts. Your innate sense of fear can literally save your life, but only if you listen. Don’t be afraid to say no if you have a bad feeling about something. The same goes for positive vibes, which can lead to fulfilling journeys that you don’t want to miss. So don’t be afraid to say yes, either.
There’s another way you communicate with yourself that profoundly affects your self-esteem. It’s called self-talk. These are the words and phrases you use to describe yourself. Remember that words have power. The more we repeat them, the more we come to believe them. Foster confidence by promising to never speak bad about yourself. The outer world is dark and critical enough. Use positive, uplifting language to foster a more fulfilling outlook. Remember to always treat yourself with kindness both with words and actions.
Have faith in your own abilities too. Never give up on your dreams. Remind yourself that anything is possible and start moving in the right direction, even if you must begin with baby steps. While you’re stepping toward your goal, be sure to stay away from unserving energy and drama. Surround yourself people and places that are supportive and positive. Let go of what you can’t control and move away from anything that drags you down. There are people, even family members, who carry a dark cloud of energy; they seem to rain on everything that is good. Help these people see the light if you can, but also know when to let go and love them from afar.
That is perhaps the most vital step of all—love. According to Dr. Robert Enright of Psychology Today, good self-care is equivalent to learning to love more consciously because “when you love, you are loving persons, and you are a person. And since all persons have worth, when you love others then you discover your own intrinsic worth.” Treat yourself well with these twelve vital steps for positive self-care, starting with loving more, and see how your own life improves.
For more personalized guidance on positive self-care, schedule a consultation with Rose today.
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What To Remember:1. If it feels wrong, don’t do it.
2. Don’t be a people pleaser.
3. Say what you mean.
4. Always trust your instincts.
5. Don’t be afraid to say “no.”
6. Don’t be afraid to say “yes,” either.
7. Never speak bad about yourself.
8. Treat yourself with kindness.
9. Never give up on your dreams.
10. Stay away from unserving energy and drama.
11. Let go of what you can’t control.
Earley, Briggit. (October, 2019) 25 Self-Care Tips to Help You Be the Best Version of You. OprahMag.com.
Forman, Tami. (April, 2019). Self-Care Is Not An Indulgence. It’s A Discipline. PathForward.com.
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